Post Dated: Baby # 2.

I remember being at the point of emotional breakdown praying to have another baby. When my oldest son was 4 Months I was ready to try for number 2. After 18 months of trying with no success, we saw as much of a specialty fertility doctor that the Law School income would allow. Two more years of law school, and no more fertility success. Needless to say, desperation was an understatement. But during this time, we turned in our adoption papers, and two weeks after our profile went live, we were chosen by a beautiful birth mother who was 6 months pregnant. SO, only three months to go before our second beautiful son arrived.
Then, that desperation turned into more mother's guilt and fear. What if I hadn't taught Lincoln everything he needed to know before we brought home another baby? Had I shown him enough love in two years? Had my desperation and moments of tears taken away from the precious time I could have been playing with him? Oh, and what about this new baby? Could I love him as much as I loved Lincoln? Could I bond with him the same way I had with my first?
I was facing a major dilemma. What would I do?
Then it happened. Henry was born. The moment I held him, and fed him his first bottle, I was overwhelmed with the same love I remembered feeling the day Lincoln was born. I was re-introduced to mothering a newborn, and it was incredible.
I had been given advice that was very helpful:
FIRST:
To help my two year old adjust, I was told to bring a gift for them when they first met their new sibling; a gift from the baby to the older sibling.
SECOND:
I was advised to get my two year old sleeping in his own bed a few months before the new baby was born, so there was no animosity shown towards the baby when they finally slept in the crib (we had Henry sleep in our room for the first few months, so Lincoln had been in his big boy bed, for 4 months by this time.)
THIRD:
While feeding the baby, have a box of special toys set aside for this time for the older child.  (Not the everyday toys, but toys just for this time) These were novel, and showed the two year old you were thinking about them, and not just the baby. My neighbor, a mother of seven, recently added, that as soon as you had fed the newborn, (since it takes a while sometimes and they get held all the time) put them down, and pick up the older child, and show them you are still their mom, and you love them.
FOURTH: 
If possible, after feeding the infant, leave them with dad or someone you trust for an hour, and take your older child on a date. Give them some one-on-one time where there is no baby. Do something they want to do; go to a park, go on a run, go to McDonalds for ice cream, the library, etc...
FIFTH: 
Realize that while newborns are tiny and new, they are tough. Allow the older sibling to help, if they will. Allow them to touch their new baby, and help with diapers, or lotion, or bath time. Lincoln asked us, "Can I touch Henry's toes?" YES! "Can I touch his hands?" YES! "Can I touch his head?" YES! "Can I poke him in the eyes?" NO! But, he knew he could love on Henry and that was okay! Don't allow the baby to be a no-no  all the time. Incorporate a lot of yeses.
SIXTH:
Prepare as best you can. During family prayer, talk about how grateful you are for the new baby, and how grateful you are for the child/children you already have. Let your older child hear you bragging about what a good helper they are (because chances are when you are talking after new baby is born, many conversations are about how you and the baby are doing.)
SEVEN: 
Realize that change is hard. Adding a new entity to the family takes some getting used to. Be patient with the meltdowns, the new outbursts that are really just ways of getting attention, and be patient with yourself as you learn to take care of two babies, perhaps a spouse, and yourself.

If any of you have more to add- please feel free. I'm always up for any additions I have neglected!