As a mom, I admit, I was initially tempted to give the new culture of
pink and pretty a pass. There are already so many things to be vigilant
about as a parent; my energy was stretched to its limit. So my daughter
slept in a Cinderella gown for a few years. Girls will be girls, right?
They will-and that is exactly why we need to pay more, rather than less,
attention to what's happening in their world. According to the American
Psychological Association, the emphasis on beauty and play-sexiness at
ever-younger ages is increasing girls' vulnerability to the pitfalls
that most concern parents: eating disorders, negative body image,
depression, risky sexual behavior. Yet here we are with nearly half of
six-year-old girls regularly using lipstick or lip gloss. The percentage
of eight- to twelve-year-old girls wearing eyeliner or mascara has
doubled in the last TWO years (I ask you: shouldn't the percentage of
eight-year-olds wearing eyeliner be zero?). A researcher told me that
when she asks teenage girls how a sexual experience felt to them they
respond by telling her how they think they looked. Meanwhile, the
marketing of pink, pretty, and "sassy" has become a gigantic business:
the Disney Princesses alone are pulling in four BILLION dollars in
revenue annually.
As I immersed myself in the research for this book, I began to trace a
line from the innocence of Cinderella to the struggles Miley Cyrus has
faced in trying to "age up," which in turn was connected to how regular
girls present themselves on Facebook (where identity itself becomes a
performance, crafted in response to your audience of 322 BFFs). It
seemed that even as new educational and professional opportunities
unfurled before my daughter and her peers, so did the path that
encouraged them to equate identity with image, self-expression with
appearance, femininity with performance, pleasure with pleasing, and
sexuality with sexualization.
So much is at stake, for mothers with girls of all ages: How do we
define girlhood? What about femininity? Beauty? Sexuality? Our choices
will tell our girls how we see them, who we want them to be, our values,
expectations, hopes, and dreams. Do we want them to be judged by the
content of their character or the color of their lip gloss?
I'm the first to admit that I do not have all the answers. Who could?
But as a mother who also happens to be a journalist (or perhaps vice
versa), I wanted to lay out the context-the marketing, science, history,
culture-in which we make our choices, to provide information and insight
that might help parents, educators, and all of us who care about girls
guide them toward their true happily-ever-afters.
pink and pretty a pass. There are already so many things to be vigilant
about as a parent; my energy was stretched to its limit. So my daughter
slept in a Cinderella gown for a few years. Girls will be girls, right?
They will-and that is exactly why we need to pay more, rather than less,
attention to what's happening in their world. According to the American
Psychological Association, the emphasis on beauty and play-sexiness at
ever-younger ages is increasing girls' vulnerability to the pitfalls
that most concern parents: eating disorders, negative body image,
depression, risky sexual behavior. Yet here we are with nearly half of
six-year-old girls regularly using lipstick or lip gloss. The percentage
of eight- to twelve-year-old girls wearing eyeliner or mascara has
doubled in the last TWO years (I ask you: shouldn't the percentage of
eight-year-olds wearing eyeliner be zero?). A researcher told me that
when she asks teenage girls how a sexual experience felt to them they
respond by telling her how they think they looked. Meanwhile, the
marketing of pink, pretty, and "sassy" has become a gigantic business:
the Disney Princesses alone are pulling in four BILLION dollars in
revenue annually.
As I immersed myself in the research for this book, I began to trace a
line from the innocence of Cinderella to the struggles Miley Cyrus has
faced in trying to "age up," which in turn was connected to how regular
girls present themselves on Facebook (where identity itself becomes a
performance, crafted in response to your audience of 322 BFFs). It
seemed that even as new educational and professional opportunities
unfurled before my daughter and her peers, so did the path that
encouraged them to equate identity with image, self-expression with
appearance, femininity with performance, pleasure with pleasing, and
sexuality with sexualization.
So much is at stake, for mothers with girls of all ages: How do we
define girlhood? What about femininity? Beauty? Sexuality? Our choices
will tell our girls how we see them, who we want them to be, our values,
expectations, hopes, and dreams. Do we want them to be judged by the
content of their character or the color of their lip gloss?
I'm the first to admit that I do not have all the answers. Who could?
But as a mother who also happens to be a journalist (or perhaps vice
versa), I wanted to lay out the context-the marketing, science, history,
culture-in which we make our choices, to provide information and insight
that might help parents, educators, and all of us who care about girls
guide them toward their true happily-ever-afters.
You can read the NY Times review of the book HERE. Regardless of whether or not your little girl is a 'girlie-girl', this book will give us great insight in to how they view themselves and the world.
Looks good. I'm always looking for an interesting read and especially one that may give me a new viewpoint. Thanks
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